I actually wrote this in July. However, today, during a depressing holiday season I needed to hear this. I pray it is what you need as well. Susan
When I work out I listen to music. I used to be able to listen to books, but as time goes by and I get off more medication my mind is less and less able to take in anything. So I just let the music wash over me. It is frustrating to not be able to listen and take in much. However, as I was finishing today I caught the beginning of Steven Curtis Chapmen’s song, “Glorious Unfolding”.
It was just enough to draw me in and look up the lyrics. Just enough for God to speak to me.
“Lay your head down tonight,
Take a rest from the fight
Don’t try to figure it out
Just listen to what I’m whispering to your heart
‘Cause I know this is not
Anything like you thought
The story of your life was gonna be”
I felt like he was reading my mind. Honestly, how perfect the words were about how I feel about my life. Is this really how we thought our lives would be? Is it how you thought your life would be? Did you think it would involve long recovery from sexual assault? All the trials that go with it?
I never dreamed I would be alone at 43. That I would not have children or grandchildren. Or any family at all. Not working because of my PTSD. This is definitely not, “Anything like I thought the story of my life was gonna be.”
You know what Steven Curtis Chapmen writes next in his song? Better yet what God writes?
“And this is going to be a glorious unfolding
Just you wait and see and you will be amazed
You’ve just got to believe the story is so far from over
So hold on to every promise God has made to us
And watch this glorious unfolding.”
You can listen to the rest of the song here and I recommend you do because it will encourage you greatly.
It is what I needed to hear today. I felt like God was saying, “Hey, your life is not over and I am still redeeming it. Have you forgotten already what you have written lately? What I’ve been telling you? I will use all of this for good and it will bring glory to Me.”
God’s saying, “Remember Me? I’m writing the end to this story!” And thank goodness He is because He’s is a much better writer than me when I try to take control! And boy do I try all too often!
So, let’s remember, God has wonderful plans in store for us despite how our lives have turned out. It will be a “Glorious Unfolding”. We just have to wait and see and be amazed!
Thank you for your mercy and grace. Especially when I try to take over my life and I think it’s such a mess. I am trusting you to bring about wonderful things from horrible trauma, all for Your glory. May I not get in the way of what You want to do. Provide me the strength to keep moving forward day by day and step by step. Thank you.
Portions of lyrics taken from Steven Curtis Chapmen’s “Glorious Unfolding”.
© 2019 Susan M. Clabaugh. All Rights Reserved.