Sexual assault changes the course of our lives. Whether we want it to our not it is a significant trauma and we need help to process through it and move on. It can leave us with PTSD, depression and anxiety, pain in our bodies, and all kinds of other issues.
When these come down on us it sometimes feels like we’re suffocating from the after effects of our trauma. Days become long and monotonous, and nights are filled with possible nightmares, and if we do sleep it isn’t for long periods. It leaves us feeling emotionally and physically exhausted.
However, it will not always be this way. There is hope in recovery. That is after all what this blog is all about. Hope after sexual assault. It took me many years to find it, but it is there. It comes in many various ways. Sometimes it’s through a good therapy session, or when you are able to share your story. Maybe it’s when your anxiety or depression have eased enough you are able to participate more in life.
Ultimately, our hope is that we will spend eternity in heaven with Jesus if we know Him. That is beyond any other hope there is, but while we are here on earth enduring hard times sometimes we need even the smallest little thing to bring us back to hope.
Earlier this week I finished processing through another assault. It took me several sessions to work through it and I was wondering if it would ever be finished. Currently, my therapist uses havening with me, and some EMDR, to process through.
After I finished that session I left with a feeling of relaxation and peace. (With exhaustion because processing trauma is hard work.) When I think of that one particular time it is still there in my memory, but I no longer feel like I could die remembering it. It is just a piece of history now that is no longer affecting me emotionally.
Granted, that by the time it was late afternoon my anxiety was back and the relaxation and peace were gone. However, that’s because I still have quite a bit of trauma to work through. Despite that, it gave me hope that one day the relaxation and peace will stay with me for days rather than a couple hours. That every day won’t be bogged down with trauma and its effects.
It is possible to work through what we have endured. There is hope for healing from sexual assault. I pray you find a therapist who can walk with you toward healing and help you process your trauma, and as you heal I hope and pray you come to know God in a whole new way. He is able to turn ashes into beauty in our lives.
© 2020 Susan M. Clabaugh. All Rights Reserved.