With Mother’s Day this weekend it seemed appropriate once again to talk about losses and the grief we have to work through.
Enduring trauma of any kind leaves you needing to process a lot of grief. It’s like heading into the mud puddle after the rain and rolling around – because it is messy.
I encourage you to think about and write out your losses. Your grief. I have done that over the past few months – especially with the loss of a certain family member that led me to have confusion over grieving those that hurt us.
I discovered that we have grief whether the person was good or bad or whether the situation was traumatizing. What causes our grief are losses. What I know is that I lost out on the family I desired to have to support and love on me growing up and in the days as I entered adulthood. I lost out on even more because I have been spending time overcoming the significant trauma I endured.
Family – biological and not having my own as an adult.
Loss of time to recovery.
Loss of income and job security for many years.
Loss of friends and relationships as I was in a much different place and just trying to stay alive.
Things I should’ve, could’ve, might’ve done with the family I didn’t get to have – like first steps, joys and sorrows of raising kids, proms, graduations, and changing the family tree.
That’s the biggest grief as we approach this weekend. The loss of the chance to be a mom and grandma. Mother’s Day is not always a happy day for many if you don’t have a good relationship with your mom, or want to be one and aren’t, or if you lost a baby or child….you get the picture. I don’t know your exact pain, but I do understand the grief and pain associated with loss.
As we approach another holiday, where our emotions can get the best of us, I encourage you to take time to deal with what might be there and trust in the One above that can redeem your life.
God can take your hurts and losses – your grief – and use it for good and to His glory. That is always my prayer and I encourage you to allow Him to do that in the days to come for you too. He will – I promise.
© 2022 All Rights Reserved. Susan M. Clabaugh.